Missing Yet Growing...

This morning I woke to froze clinging to the windows, no sign of spring in sight. I pull my covers over my head in hopes that there is still time for me to gracefully arise for my deep sleep… I reach to a cold empty spot next to me, a void, I long to wake entwined with my mate, slow kisses on his neck, cold feet looking for sanctuary. Today I wake alone.
I have a pretty simplistic routine, however I can visualize several alternatives, all which begin with love of self and partnership. I am not a morning girl so often you will hear primal sounds spewing from my lips, stretching longing to touch, to be touched.
Sipping my tea while I whittle through a crossword puzzle… I present myself before my Alter and sit silent for a few minutes taking in cleansing breaths and releasing and fears or apprehension that have built up through the night… I dream of what I so long for and breath… as I begin to chant the house begins to vibrate as the tones rolls from my tongue. I love when someone else enjoys this harmonic tone from deep within. Nearly thirty minutes have past my mind body and soul to be aligned to greet the new day… I begin to find my smile.
Showering together is such an intimate act yet so primal to cleanse our mates while flesh rubs against one another while the warm waters pound down on us.
I would love to find a corner in Powell’s and read passages from a trashy novel and comedy or American lit. I would love to walk the boardwalks the adorn the cities waterfront… I wonder if the open market is open and will they have fresh parsnips for tonight stew. I hope to see some season fresh flowers that are a must have to beatify the dining table at home. I look across the way and see you exchanging banter with the local artist. Coffee, tea anything warm to sip on while we sit along the curb and exchange comments and giggles about the silly things we see in one another… or discuss human rights, the arts, or who is going to win the game of scrabble that awaits us when we return home.
Standing in the kitchen the heart of every home, a place that requires all loving hands on deck to join in the preparation of the evening supper. Cooking together is a spiritual union in it’s self…
The scrabble game begins and I still reach for the dictionary to make sure I am not creating words to add an additional ten points to my score sheet. I am a horrible speller and roll on the floor when I am called on my ridiculous words I create…
I need to relax spooning on the couch for a quick nap; I am calm as I feel your chest rise with each breath pressing against my back. Your breath gently whisking my neck I begin to get goose bumps and press tighter into you.
Should we catch a late night movie at McMenamins? Should we grab a movie and stay snuggled? I should be writing… We both have emails to respond to before the day closes; maybe we should seek a hotub to soak in… mutual massage maybe a local brew and the favorite watering hole… beware libations tend to make me… well we will save that one for later…snicker!
Our kisses linger the butterflies are loose and magic is present… let me linger with you, let me caress you, let me know I am safe, let me love…
Mars Meadows lefever
2008